Saturday, February 14, 2009

The curse of Neo Advaita ...


Shopping for salvation

It could be you. YOU could be the lottery winner, Neo Advaita style ... Truth as a fast-food outlet, the latest soap product. Neo Advaita has branded and packaged enlightenment as a cure-all for a generation caught up in an endless quest for instant gratification. This is the post-modern democratisation of Self realisation, a sophisticated seduction of the Capitalist ego, which promises the ultimate conquest: personal dominion of the spiritual!

Neo Advaita is not Advaita Vedanta and it is not the teachings of Ramana Maharshi either. Ramana merely used the language of Vedanta to explain his experience of Truth and said Be As You Are. Vedanta stops at mentally affirming the existence of the Self whereas Ramana counselled to go beyond the mind for Self realisation.

Who are you? Well, you'll never find out if you listen to this bunch of morons! The Neo Advaita trademarks are: Anyone can be enlightened (Apparently!) ... The "I" is still there after enlightenment (You can say that again with this lot!) ... You don't need a guru, you can do it yourself (So why do we need any of these idiots then?) ... Nothing exists and there's no sadhana: Nothing To Do (Except attend all their satsangs and give them lots of adulation and cash for their multiple DVDs, books, photographs and meditation cushions!)

Just for the record, Ramana taught that realising the Self is predestined and a matter of Grace. He said the "I" is totally gone after enlightenment and that the presence of an enlightened being is essential, until the Self is attained. And Ramana endorsed all paths, stating that sadhana depends on the individual.

Neo Advaita has hijacked and emasculated Ramana's Self realisation, exploiting it for its own ends. It has taken his Do Nothing instruction, which Ramana said was only for the advanced and perverted it to mean that absolutely NO sadhana is necessary. Anyone can "have" enlightenment NOW! No hassle, no effort: realisation before you've even got there.

This is a shallow, consumerist interpretation scraped from the retina of Ramana's teaching, which sells you abstract notions of enlightenment as the real deal: like buying on credit and never having to pay. It is the description of enlightenment minus the genuine article, an enticing theoretical product where body is divorced from mind. All you get is talk and pseudo-awakenings become the new benchmark. Saying it, replaces being it. Soft words and the language of love masquerade as the real thing. Understanding realisation is suddenly the accomplishment. Salvation served up on a slab: consume and you're enlightened!

The upshot is that anything goes if you can argue it. In the absence of visceral experience, the slightest tremor is an Awakening. And with the arbitary use of any free-floating concept, even Ramana can be castigated as a fake. Like a 1000-headed hydra, one guru pops up only to be shouted down by another who shouts even louder (As Mr Heinz so sagely put it: 57 varieties of Mind Fuck Soup!) This is why this Paradigm of Paradise is so jumbled and confused. It's a hybrid monster: Presence, Being In The Moment, Neti Neti and mental deconstruction to the nth degree, all in the name of satsang!

This ugly assault on the Citadel of Consciousness is led by the bastard progeny of The Godfather; U.G. Krishnamurti (Remember this is the man who described all spiritual experiences as dogshit and the guru's grace as secondhand vomit!) U.G.'s Blitzkrieg boys are Tony Parsons, Karl Renz and Jed McKenna (is he really Adyashanti's evil twin?)

Tony Parsons is the ringmaster of this circus and its most cogent spokesman. He is the prime mover in the European New Wave along with Karl Renz - both with their respective brands of bullshit humour to flesh things out. Tony has made a career out of a mythical Walk in the Park, which he defines as his Awakening experience. This didn't stop him from hanging out for years with the original Rajneesh (not his counterfeit copy!) Tony's clique indulge in a game of partisan one-upmanship. They are all desperate to join the so-called Awakening Club and dissenting voices are condemned to the gulag of "You don't get it, you're so dualist!" In this world, everyone including Ramana is deemed guilty of dualist speech and action. The logic behind this resembles the Marxist mindset-gone-mad: paranoia and cries of revisionism are fine-tuned with asinine comments, in what amounts to a kangaroo-court of self-appointed Non Dual Word Police. Tony's mantra is: "Vasanas, what vasanas? There is only this!" A superfluous wave of the hands then illustrates this great mystery (NOT!) All we are left with is the vacuous nature of Tony's smug bonhomie and his tired old jokes ...

The next member of this triumvirate is American enfant terrible, Jed McKenna, who doesn't actually exist (But then, nor does Sri Sri SRI Kevinandaji!) This fictional entity is the King of Smartass Logic and Neo Advaitin non-concepts, blurted out in a continuous stream of self-congratulatory invective. His idée fixe is a clumsy and trite analysis of the novel Moby Dick, where the whale represents the ego and Ahab is the mind's attempt to annihilate itself. Jed is a Master of folksy Mid West patter. The catch is, it's all just words.

Last up is Karl Renz. He's from the Academy of Mental Gymnastics, denying everything much like those Neti Neti hooligans of Old School Hinduism. Here comes the mind-wank of perpetually refuting and ridiculing absolutely anything somebody says, without any of the enlightenment. Poor Karl, he's still trapped in the mind: negation is his only friend!

Neo Advaita is a Massacre of the Innocents. It is a cynical ploy totally devoid of humility. Without the need for sadhana or any prior qualification for enlightenment, anyone can be a guru. Tickling the vanity and satisfying the illusion that it is "us" who are in control of our awakening, this horror story is an existential meltdown created by none other than, THE EGO! It is designed by the spiritually and emotionally lost, its mouthpieces are avaricious Devils in Disguise (See the movie Rosemary's Baby for a concise analogy!)

We leave you with a quote from the ultimate Chi-Ting publication of all time, The Bible, Matthew 7: 15-21: "Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly they are ferocious wolves ... "



40 comments:

  1. One is mildly pleased that at last the putrefaction of proledom has been exposed and hopefully these vagabonds will be sent packing to the council estates from whence they came!

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  2. David, do you think my double wide trailer, which is side by side with my momma's double wide, placed beneath flowerin magnolia trees on 5 acres of a cut up hog farm constitutes somethin like the "council estates" you referred too above? I have to say without knowin you that you sound like the kind of a Limey we folks in East Texas fought off to a stand still back in 17 and 76! Not that I don't agree with you! What is this here "council estates" to witch you are referrin? Sounds like a spread my Uncle Edd liives on in Point Blank, Texas!

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  3. excellent awakening talk.

    Thanks.

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  4. I cannot agree more, I cannot agree less. I think that this supports both Advaitha and not-so-advaita philosophies.
    Poor Sankaracharya, who devoted a life time for teaching of Vedanta, he will be turning in his grave. oops, his ashes will be doing the spinning !!
    VeeGee

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    1. sages are not cremated, they are entomed.

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  5. Meh,enlightenment schmenlightenment. You know what an enso (the zen circle) really symbolizes? A dog chasing it's tail. Have fun!

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  6. Bravo, Mr Chi-Ting, for your excoriating diatribe.
    From my reading you are lambasting the packagers and sellers of that which can never be packaged and sold.
    I have to admit to less anger and more amusement at the spectacle than you clearly feel, for me it is the inevitable outgrowth of the profiteering, capitalistic mind-set that is invading all cultures today.
    U.G. at least made a point of trying to steer away aspirants to 'enlightenment' saying "If you knew what this was you would not want it"
    Please don't burst a blood vessel in your apoplexy. I'd miss your caustic comments and the remarkable company you keep in your followers.
    (Any chance of Atilla's phone number?)

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  7. What you lot need is a good christian baptism and compulsory viewing of 'Coronation street' from 30 years ago... As for that Donkey from East Texas you will be deep fried in lard and served with roast potatoes for a properly righteous sunday dinner!

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  8. Tralier parks?
    Luxury!
    You won't know what the arse-end of life is till you've been kicked to the ground by a gang of chav glue-sniffers in Hull.

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  9. Sundanda, I prfer my taters fried in lard along with my side meat, not roasted like you limeys may like it. By the way what is "chav"?

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  10. Chuck,
    A chav is the feral offspring of a council estate resident, the outcome of several generations of social welfare recipients.
    We breed them in the UK in large numbers. You won't need to worry about Eastern religions or heaven and hell or the mind/body duality or reaching nirvana if you have had face-time with a gang of chavs.

    Direct experience, you can't beat it.

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  11. I only do public orgies and mass executions. No private parties!

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  12. It was face-time of sorts, in that they broke my nose.
    If only I had incredible chi-ting powers like Kevinandaji, I could have levitated over them, leaving them flailing their fists and bags of evo-stick uselessly in the air.


    Chuck's such a cute li'l donkey, I just want to scratch behind his ears.

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  13. Much abliged fan of atillo for explainin what a chav is! Guess I shouldnt be hard on you limeys since my own folks were limeys several generations back. They come first to what is now the state of Alabama and moved on to Texas in the 1830s to be hog breeders. Still we weren't allowed to watch limey movies on TV or immitate the limey manner of speach... By the way, what's a evo-stick? Tell me that and I'll tell you about gar, if you don't already know what a gar is! By the way the photo of the mule-- not no donkey-- is not yours truly. That is Da Free Jack, who I sometimes chanellize. He talks a lot better than me. Your not callin me a chav are yu?

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  14. Evo-stick is a potent hallucinogenic resin that oozes from the branches of the B&Q tree. It is used by British tribespeople to assist in spirit journeys, healings and nights on the piss. And beatings.

    Da Free Jack is a fine fellow.

    A gar is a fish.

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  15. Thank you so much for having a go at all that "Neo- advaita bollocks" (Bollocks =Nonsense). I wasted about thirty quid in London last year, going along to a Tony Parsons show, then to a mad Israeli woman called Umani or something like that, and finally, the highly irritating Jeff Thingy... uh, Foster. Fuck, he is really borrrriiing! Wouldn't even get his cock out when I asked him. got all annoyed. Sorry, 'Thatness' got annoyed, coz there isn't actually a person there to get annoyed, you dumbass!

    There's rich satirical pickings in this latest shower of spiritual hustlers. I'm just pissed off about my thirty quid.
    Sincerely,
    Duh Free Tom

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  16. Oh gosh. I'm worried now. I blog the Tony Parsons kind of stuff, sort of, because some really weird change of perception hit me one day and his words seemed as good as any. Not familiar with the other two dudes you refer to in the article. Well, maybe you could have a look at the blog, where a storm in a teacup brews today (great fun) concerning some comments made over at the Church of the Churchless blog about some jokey "rules of nonduality" I wrote. Would be interested to know your opinion. Is my blog crap? I'm inclined to believe it is, inasmuch as all words and concepts tend to box the universe in.
    http://nothingexistsdespiteappearances.blogspot.com

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  17. Dear Ms No One In Particular,
    Your blog is not crap, but might we suggest Less Words, More Bile! Choose a willing victim, porky Tony Parson's would be perfect, grad their testicular baubles, squeeze and twist viciously until they are moaning and groaning on the floor. This is known as the test of Oneness!
    His most Righteous Holiness Sri Sri Swami Kevinanda.

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  18. http://www.youtube.com/user/ObaNarayanShivaji999

    a good one for you to blast with passion lol

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  19. You like to go on like that! Well you can... but I think you miss the point. As long as you believe it is everything but the most simple thing, well that believe is an identification and it will never let you rest as what you are. You must remember that the realization of the self really has to do with the end of all entertained notion... this tou you seem mental-realization? Well, notions are mental or mind stuff. So what you call neo-advaita is not cheap. Can you really drop the notion that you need anything to be as you are... walk the path of neo-advaita, if you can, and the talk after. Because to say the truth: why aren't you yet what you are? Can you answer that?!

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  20. "Yah Boo" to you too! Did we take the piss out of one of your fave raves? Shocking innit!

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  21. You are right, I'm a tosser... but look, what I get from the criticism of what you call neo-advaita is a good safeguard from one's own ego and delusions and fixated attitude. But I was reading the point by point critic of Karl Renz and it could have been applied to Nisargadatta's himself!!! I don't think that the label neo-advaita should be applied to Karl Renz... he is different from all the Gangaji, the Adyashanti and all that kind of very soft-no depth teaching. I have been studying a great deal of pure classic advaita-vedanta teaching for the last 15-16 years and the center of my herat is fixed on Nisargadatta, and when I read the point by point critic of Karl Renz I'm amazed that the guy who makes the critic has a lot of difficulty understanding what Karl says... in spite of his in-depth study of classical advaita... but to his credit he says that he has not really listened to Karl a lot. Anyway, I respect and welcome your web-site and critics for it is good... and it is true that a lot of seekers lack a deep intellectual understanding of what spirituality is. Have a nice day.

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  22. You sound just like a guru! Please set up shop so I can put you up on this site as soon as possible!

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  23. You are funny... thanks for replying to me. Have a nice day.

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  24. Proper advaitins see no difference between classical and neo advaita. They are merely expressions of the same thing. Fake advaitins think that anyone can get enlightened and they are the guru to do it. They think the seeker has the "choice" and can "get" enlightened anytime, just from the right teacher/teaching. The individual is still there in both cases. Fake advaitins - the seekers and their gurus - are plastic dummies. Shoppers. Toss. Trash.

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  25. I am usually late, Just seems the way of it, but what I did note with respect to JED McKenna, is the comment, that its all just words. Dah, of course its all just words, but surely its what one does with such words. I got one thing from that dude, but then again, it was also implied by that Jiddu Krishnamurti cat, and that was, can you do nothing with respect to the psycological self and its ramblings and predominatly the associated feelings. YOU who, of course, but for me, and call me WHATEVER, but please dont call me Adviaita, neo Advaita, and GOD knows what, This all comes down to FUCKING HONESTY. WHAT DO YOU KNOW IS TRUE. WHo are you, what are you, where are you, and I got honest. i admitted, well thats not exactly true, i felt and allowed that 5.00 AM dread to do its thing, when I knew beyond knowing, that I didn't have a fucking clue. Another hint i got From that Jed Mckenna dude. If it kills me, So fucking what. So To hell with Advaita, new fucking advaita, WHATEVER, this is surely about being honest, and doing in spite of this ENTITY called YOU, that appears to want to keep you SAFE< SECURE< FAMILIAR AND IMPRISONED, and the only way to get beyond those clutches is to not do a fucking thing with respect to it, and it slowly fades, and what is left becomes just what is left, and I assure you, if you do this, honestly do this, then what is left, is NOT the reality that one has known and lived, and there is no use describing it, no use setting up shop as the latest ASSHOLE money making, grandstanding GURU on the block, no, this is about YOU, having the honesty to have a good look at things, and YOU will be surprised. YOU will be FUCKING blown to kingdom come, and you wont go into it, because this is scary enough. YOU wont set up shop, because WHY, to be another prick on the block. So FUCK advaita, NEO advaita, MASTERS and gurus, and all things nice. pffff. This is about what is so, and open to all.

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  26. No-one becomes enlightened; it's a 'seeker fiction'.

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  27. grab their testicular baubles, squeeze and twist viciously until they are moaning and groaning on the floor. This is known as the test of Oneness!

    haha, this is funny,
    .....have any agreed to be tested?

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  28. I have been told that Spermananda alias Premananda (who was originally a Welsh truck driver from Bangor in Wales before his Australian accent makeover) - is up for anything - and I mean anything or anyone! So I think he would be a good victim to start off with ...

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  29. well send him an offer he cant refuse......prepare the camera and 2 house bricks

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  30. Tony Parsons is what you get when a double glazing salesman takes too many mushrooms - well he was walking in the park...

    Unlike his holiness Bill Hicks: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_HVd-BdxAmU

    L,
    Sid.

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  31. Ramana Maharshi was bullshit. Some half retarded guru prancing around in his underwear and everyone bowing at his feet while he read comic books. What a joke. If any guru tells you a method for enlightenment they are full of dog shit. What's even funnier is the people who defend him and yet never met the man.

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  32. Your statement: "Vedanta stops at mentally affirming the existence of the Self"...is WRONG. How could an "affirmation" be anything other than "mental". This does not mean a vedantin "stops" there! Apparently, you don't have a clue about Vedanta.

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    1. Vedanta assumes that the Self can be discovered by rejecting all objects as not-self. The practitioner attempts to cut loose anything the "I" identifies with in the belief that the "I" as pure subjectivity will arise. This is a mental practice dreamed up by the mind in order to attain its own absence. The mind can never effect its own absence and any attempt to attain something else via using the mind will only ever result in 'more mind' - not less!

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  33. Lisa Cairns brought me here :)

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    1. Well aren't you the lucky one! Now you can drop Lisa Cairns like a plastic bag full of dog shit. She won't mind she doesn't exist anyway!

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  34. I somehow believe there can be shift. It's really annoying.

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  35. Yes, well put!

    For those interested in exploring this subject further, this article explores 6 main problems with the neo-advaita movement: http://liveanddare.com/neo-advaita/

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